My first playdate with Daisy – in early July 2024 – came at the end of a very long, busy week and I was absolutely shattered but I wasn’t missing the opportunity to see Daisy again. The playdates are blocks of time where you get to spend time with your dog and start building the relationship that will help them to be the best assistance dog they can be for you. You also learn all of the commands that the dog has already been taught and start practicing them so that you can get comfortable using them and the dog can get used to responding to you. I was both excited and nervous, having officially matched with Daisy.
For this trip, it was Mum and I took Izzy so that Izzy could meet Daisy for the first time. On the previous trip, it had just been my Mum and I: we had been meeting Daisy for the time time, to get to know her a bit and to decide whether or not she would be a good fit for me and for us as a family (spoiler alert: she is!) plus Daisy had had a cough and we’d all agreed that we’d wait until the first official playdate for the two of them to meet.
We started the playdate in the paddock, just me and Mum and Izzy, and then one of the trainers brought Daisy out to meet us. She was so adorable and so excited, practically jumping up and down like she was on a trampoline. The moment the two dogs first saw each other was… A Lot. Izzy was barking. Daisy was barking. I was so glad I had my Loops in because they were very loud. I think Izzy didn’t like another dog encroaching on her person (me) and I think Daisy was just barking because she didn’t understand why Izzy was barking at her when she wasn’t doing anything wrong as far as she could tell. The trainer advised us to let them sort it out between themselves – let them set their boundaries and let them test those boundaries – and let them just get to know each other, something that was easier for them to do in an outside space since it gives them plenty of room to get closer and back off and so on. Based on that first meeting, it’s definitely going to take a while for the two of them to get used to each other.
After some solid time in the paddock, we went inside and I got to have a good cuddle with Daisy, which was lovely. Izzy clearly found that quite hard. While I was reconnecting with Daisy, she did at least have my Mum as a safe space but we also let the two dogs roam around the room and try to figure out how to exist together in a smaller space and figure out how to share me, essentially. That’s certainly going to take some time but we were reassured that it often takes an existing dog and a new assistance dog a while to build a relationship of their own; we just need to give them time and reward them for every positive interaction.
The next part was watching as one of the trainers ran through all of the commands that Daisy has learned so far. It was very cute: she was so eager to please (and to get a treat) that she was very enthusiastic in her responses, sometimes even anticipating them. Then it was my turn to try them all. I have to admit that I found it really hard: there were commands that I’d never used before, different ways to respond depending on how Daisy completed a task, and remembering which hands to use for different commands, etc. And, of course, Daisy knows them all so well that she’d often preempt me, which was very cute but didn’t exactly help me practice the commands. So it was hard, confusing and more than a bit stressful – it was a lot of information at once – but Daisy was so good and so eager to please and there was still plenty of time to go over it all so I wasn’t too worried.
After that, we went outside onto the lane and I was shown how to walk Daisy on a lead as a service dog, compared to how you would walk a pet dog (although she will get that too since there will be many situations, such as daily walking and exercising, where she will walk on a lead like a normal dog). It was a struggle! There are so many components going on at the same time, so many things that you need to remember: I have to check that she’s consistently looking at me and checking in; I have to remember what each of my hands are supposed to be doing; I have to remember when to reward her (while still walking, which I struggled with A LOT). I also have to make sure not to trip over something, or fall over my own feet, or walk into a hedge. Plus Daisy is a dog and she does get distracted so I do have to keep her on task, even if – for the most part – she was incredibly well behaved. Trying to hold onto all of those things at the same time was a real struggle and definitely the most stressful part so far; it is going to take A LOT of practice.
We also spent some more time in the paddock and practiced recall. Since her name had been changed from River to Daisy, the trainers had been spending a lot of time teaching her her new name. Apparently she’d picked up really quickly, which was good to know; the trainer we were working with that day said that they’d all had more trouble with it then Daisy herself had! We also gave Izzy and Daisy another chance to hang out in a big, open space and that didn’t go too badly. There was definitely less barking and they did manage to get closer to each other without Izzy in particular getting freaked out; they were also a little better about the other getting close to me. It was really interesting to watch them try and figure each other out and although it will definitely take a while for them to build a relationship, it felt like they made progress even in that one day. They even had a very brief nose-to-nose before Izzy decided that that was a bit too much too fast and it only resulted in a couple of barks. Izzy will be coming to future playdates so they’ll have more opportunities to get used to each other.
And that was the end of our play date! I think it went as well as it could have. I was quite overwhelmed by how much there is to know and how much there is to remember all at once, but there’s time to get used to that. There’s time to learn. So I’m not worried, just a bit overwhelmed. Me, Mum, and Izzy caught the train home, all three of us exhausted. We stopped in London to have dinner with one of my parents before getting in the car and driving home. I don’t think I’ve ever been so relieved to get home and lie down in my bed; I was absolutely beyond it, physically and mentally.
I basically spent the next few days sleeping; I was beyond exhausted, both from the playdate and the week leading up to it – I’d been part of a team putting on a symposium that I’d then presented at and then I’d worked on the team for a conference the next day, both at my old university. I’d held it together for the playdate but after that, I just crashed. I assumed that the exhaustion and general feeling of unwellness were due to completely overdoing it during that week but then, just to be safe before going out, I took a COVID test and tested positive. I was pretty confident where I would’ve caught it and apart from the playdate, I hadn’t been anywhere or seen anyone (other than my Mum who somehow managed not to catch it from me) so we got in contact with Autism Dogs and let them know; as far as I know, no one there had tested positive, which was a real relief. So hopefully it was only me that suffered and fortunately, my experience of it wasn’t that bad. I was honestly more annoyed that I’d broken my streak of NOT catching COVID, almost five years after news of COVID started spreading. So, for that, I’m very grateful.
Up next is the second playdate!
